Often, the best lessons in life come during the most difficult moments. It’s an ironic twist to your torment. However, just because there’s a lesson to be learned doesn’t lessen the fact that it really did hurt you, break you, embarrass you, scare you, or scar you. Whether a million other people have experienced similar pains and perils, made the same mistakes, or tripped and fell at the same spots you did, doesn’t matter. Don’t ever let anyone generalize, or belittle your battles because they are yours and the pain is personal. Of course your true lessons should go deeper than any obvious commitments to just make better choices. Beyond your choice to choose more wisely, you should also feel a new strength of purpose within yourself. You’ve faced your fears, or maybe you’re still facing them, but that’s what makes you better for your battles; you are still pressing forward.
Still, even with positive progress, I know it seems like for every one step you take in the direction of the life you want, something shows up from the past or the present and shoves you back two steps, or more. One day people praise your performance and the next day seem content to only be contentious and put dents in your confidence. I think the worst thing anyone can do to someone else, especially when they’re already fighting so much to keep climbing and not fall is to give them a push over the edge, rather than pull them back and keep them safe.
This rudeness reminds me of a word I used to hear people say when they felt that they were being mistreated, or disrespected by someone or some circumstance in their life. I still hear it today. It’s the word, DIS. You may have heard this form of slanguage when people say, “Don’t dis me like that!” It basically means, “Don’t treat me that way, it hurts or offends me.” So, what can this simple three letter slang word teach us about living a better life with others? Well, have you ever been ‘dissed’ by friends, family, co-workers, or life? Has anyone ever put a (dis) in front of your (dis)courage, or tried to (dis)credit you, doubted your (dis)abilities, or your (dis)beliefs? Has anyone ever been (dis)tant, when you needed the (dis)comfort of a hug or a shoulder to lean on? Have you ever been dis-stressed, dis-gusted, or dis-appointed? You get the point of this dis-cussion. It’s dis-concerting how many times we’ve all been dissed; by others and especially by ourselves.
Now, it’s time to stop dishing out the dissing and find the peace we’ve been missing. We’ve all got some kind of battle raging in the background and behind the smiles are hidden miles of heartaches. When someone says they’ve been there, they probably have, or are there now themselves. So let’s stop judging and grudging. Let’s stop being bitter and start being better for our battles and fight them together. We can each do something to help each other in more ways and more often.
However, if you still feel the need to dis yourself or someone else; don’t DIS them, CON them. Be con-siderate of their feelings and show true con-cern for their pain. Whether or not you can see or feel their feelings, you can still be a con-duit of comfort to con-sole their con-flicted souls. You can con-stantly con-tribute to their con-fidence and con-gratulate them when they’ve achieved a major milestone, even if you think it’s just a simple stepping stone. If you will also con-duct your con-versations within yourself in this con-structive manner, you will be more con-tent, have more con-trol and con-viction in the direction of your life and you will be well on your way to con-quering any con-frontations ahead and truly living a more victorious and peaceful life.